Pentecost 16, 2008
Matthew 18:15-20
“Don’t Judge Me!”
Grace, mercy, and peace be to you from God our Father and from our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Amen.
I once read that Pastors love sin because without sin they would be out of a job. All I can say is that I wish I was out of a job because sin destroys. As a Pastor I am surrounded by sin and it’s unfortunate consequences. One of the hardest things to deal with is speaking to a person that rejects the idea that something they have done is wrong and sinful. One of the most common lines I hear is “Don’t judge me.”
For anyone that has even just a slight knowledge of Scripture the defense of “don’t judge me” is often used and quoted. Many people know the passages of Scripture that go along these lines: “If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.” (John 8:7) “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.” (Matthew 7:1-5)
“Don’t judge me.” Those were the words shouted at me by a friend whom I felt was in need of hearing some tough love. I was in seminary and was friends with a girl that I had briefly dated. She had been through some very tough times. She was bi-polar, was a single mother to a darling boy whom was conceived in a rape. She worked as much as she could but had trouble paying the bills.
Unfortunately she started dating a married man, refused to take her medication for her mental disorder, and began to dump her son on any friends that would watch him so that she could go out. I was one of those friends. As the weeks went by it seemed that I had enough when I found out that she had left her son with some friends, left for the weekend with her boyfriend, and got in trouble with the law for drug use. I told her that what she was doing was wrong and that if she wasn’t willing to change her lifestyle she wasn’t ready to be a parent.
Those were tough words for a young Seminarian that had no children of his own and was seemingly judging her. Her words to me; at least those that can be repeated were “Don’t judge me!” She even had friends from out of state that called me to let me know how much I had hurt her with those words and that if I really cared for her would be happy if she was happy no matter what she decided to do. Those words haunted me “don’t judge me.” But if you care about someone and they are hurting themselves…how can you not tell them they are sinning and hurting not only themselves but others. Is it really me judging a person when they are breaking God's law or is it God's judment?Unfortunately she would go on to get addicted to cocaine, give her son to her parents, and spend months in a Rehabilitation home.
“If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.” (Matthew 18:15-17)
Our text does not tell us to judge someone but to speak to your brother if they sin against you. What is the difference? The Christian is not to cast stones on someone out of malice. We are not to think that we are better than others like the Pharisees and thus judge that someone deserves to be stoned. We are not to ignore our own sin only to point out others sin. We are not to defend our sins by changing the subject upon another’s sins. We are not to gossip and spread rumors about what we think another has done.
So what are we to do? We are to go to our brothers and sisters in Christ who have sinned and lovingly speak to them. The whole point of this verse is to go to a brother or sister that has sinned and speak to them so that they do not fall into their sins. True friends do go to another and speak to them when the are in danger of hurting themselves physically or even worse; when they are in danger of losing their faith. Our Gospel lesson is all about love and faith; and if necessary law.
My friend that I was telling you about earlier got out of rehab. She went to counseling, took her medication regularly, moved back near her parents, got her son back, is now happily married…and shared with me something wonderful…that I and a few others whom she thought were rude and judgmental had shown her what true love was. It was unconditional love but it was love that shared God; it was love that wanted to keep her from harm and loss of faith.
We are all in need of that true love from each other and in need of God’s loving forgiveness. Our greatest need is God’s grace and that is surely what He gives us this very day as we have been forgiven for Jesus sake. We owe it to each other to unburden guilty consciences, to quiet fears caused by the guilt of sin. Our Father in heaven promises to forgive when Christians forgive each other. The Lord Jesus is in our very midst when we forgive each other our sins. Nothing binds us together as brothers and sisters in Christ so closely as does constant and mutual assurance of the forgiveness of sins.
My brothers and sisters in Christ. Your sins are forgiven. Our Lord sought each one of us out…like the lost sheep…while we were still dead to our sins. Through baptism we have been washed in Christ and made clean. Each and every Sunday as we receive forgiveness from Christ himself we are reminded of our baptism and the vow God made to us on that day. Through Baptism God has added each one of you to His own people to declare the wonderful deeds of our Savior, who has called us out of darkness into His marvelous light. Amen.
Now may the peace of God which passes all human understanding keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus our Lord and Savior. Amen.
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